Put Some Spring into Your Relationship

loving-couple-outsideSpring! It’s the time of year – also known as springtime – when ideas of rebirth, rejuvenation, renewal, resurrection and regrowth take place. It’s also the time that people do spring cleaning, seem to be more energetic, and change their daily routines due to longer daytime hours.

Is springtime reflected in your relationship? If you’re tired of the way things are and need a change, this is a good time to renew or resurrect your relationship.

Here are 4 tips to help bring springtime to your relationship:

Tip 1—Prioritize Your Relationship

No second guessing here; our romantic, intimate relationship should be the #1 priority—even before our children (even though they become the center of our universe) and definitely before work. The stress of family, work, and your relationship is just too much.

Figure out how to take that stress down a notch by remembering that happiness in your relationship starts with you and your mate. Don’t allow the romance in your relationship to fade from memory. Think of some of the activities you shared when you first started dating…outdoor sex? It’s warm enough now and this could be a great de-stressor.

The point is to reintroduce the spice and zing. And, if you never had it, now’s the time to make it happen. Make your relationship priority #1 and put it at the top of your love list now!

Tip 2—Dust Up on Your Communication

Our relationships can get dusty when we don’t stay on top of our communication. This is the time to make assertive, honest communication a top priority. Is there anything important that you've been withholding? It could be an excellent time during this season of renewal and rebirth to clear the air and say what needs to be communicated.

Here is the equation to clean-up your dusty communication:

  •       Make sure your body language and non-verbal gestures are consistent.
  •        Look into each other’s eyes during intimacy without being judgmental or critical.
  •        Have empathy when speaking.

Tip 3—Create Shared Relationship Visions

Always include your significant other when creating your personal goals for the future. If you’re not feeling important to your spouse or mate, share that information with them! Not sharing will only invite the feeling of not being important to keep coming back.

When you think about what you want for yourself, your family, and your career you must also create shared visions and goals for your relationship. The “we” concept has great power when you want to be heard, validated and when you want your feelings to matter.

If you don’t have a relationship vision, get one! This is so important for your mutual growth. What are the relationship rules? What are the financial goals? Who’s planning for retirement? Who’s counting when it comes to sex?

See the vision, smell the vision, be the vision!

Tip 4—Put Away Old Sexual Habits and Spring into New Ones

Acting on your sexual fantasies with your mate allows you to keep your sexual relationship fresh and exciting. Even couples who have a healthy and active sex life need to spice it up occasionally. Get comfortable talking about sex and your sexual fantasies with your partner.

Supposedly, this is the person who “has your back” for life. There should already be trust and vulnerability in the relationship to make these conversation easier. If not, it is time to bare your soul, get to the naked truth of your sexual desires and wants.

Express your wants, needs, and fantasies candidly. Sex is the physical aspect of love in your relationship and it’s needed! The mind, body (booty), and soul all need to be taken care of in our romantic relationships. Be the fantasy you want your spouse to dream of!

Use these tips to start stronger and healthier bonds in your marriage or long-term relationships. These relationship tips are virtually guaranteed to recapture love and intimacy and make you ready to spring into springtime and everything it holds!

Nicole Daniels
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Nicole Daniels

Nicole Daniels is a Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist (LCMFT), Substance Abuse Professional (SAP), AAMFT Approved Supervisor, and a Diplomat of American Association of Clinical Sexology from the American Board of Sexology. She received her Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology from Radford University and has served in the mental health field as a skilled therapist for more than 15 years.
Nicole Daniels
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